Today we have a guest post from my good friend Sarah Allerding, sharing about what to do when chronic illness limits your sympathy.
I recently learned something that scared me a little. My chronic illness has made it hard for me to empathize with someone who doesn’t want to do something because they feel a little under the weather. A little under the weather, I think? When was the last time I felt just a little under the weather? Much of the time I feel very or even extremely under the weather and I still do things. I go shopping, teach Sunday school, lead women’s Bible study, make dinner and other things that are not so easy to do when you feel sick. If someone told me I was going to feel a little under the weather tomorrow, I would be so happy! I would probably try to do all sorts of things that I couldn’t usually do.
Here I am, feeling worse than many people feel when they take a sick day, and people expect me to keep going. They think I should be doing things a normal person does. I should not stop because of my chronic illness. I should just push through it because I have to. And then someone wants the day off because they are a little under the weather. How do I ever empathize with that?
Do you ever feel like this? It definitely can be difficult, but think about it. They don’t know what it is like to feel sick all day every day. They aren’t used to feeling that way. They don’t have the coping skills we have developed through the hard grind of being sick every day. We have learned to get used to it because it is our new normal. To them, being under the weather is not normal.
Try to be patient with them. They have never been in your shoes. Hopefully, there was a time when you were in their shoes although you may hardly remember what it is like to be truly 100% anymore. I don’t think I do. They don’t know and they aren’t you. Be patient with them just like you would like them to be patient with your limitations that they don’t understand. And remember, when you lose patience with them, don’t beat yourself up because of it. Jesus was perfectly patient in your place and he died on the cross to wash away all of our sinful impatience. Jesus will help you grow in your patience toward others.
Sarah Allerding
Guest Writer
Sarah is a forgiven child of God who enjoys writing. For two years she has been sick with a chronic illness. One of her greatest desires is to help other people and one of those ways she hopes to help others is by writing about chronic illness. She lives in Michigan and also enjoys playing the guitar, reading, drawing, and riding horses.